This past week I met with a new doctor specializing in integrative, holistic solutions. During our session, we covered the symptoms that have challenged my health and well-being since this past summer leading up to my debilitating anxiety and panic disorder earlier this fall. Seeing and understanding the results of eight vials of blood was an awakening. In my heart, I knew my body was out of balance, but I didn’t realize to what extent until I took action to seek out a different path of care.
Taking a path different from the “traditional” is not always bad. I’ve been told these last few years, “this is just the way it is and can be this way for several more years.” I settled for that answer until it landed me in the ER last month. It wasn’t until after I came home from the ER that day did I finally get honest with myself. I knew there had to be a better way to health than just one prescription after another. Note: I am not saying medications are wrong, and plenty of people near and dear to me require medicines for various reasons, but for me, it just wasn’t the answer, and my body strongly sent that message.
Now that I’m on an alternative path to getting my body back in balance, it’s time to get honest with my spirit about my dream of writing full-time.
Each of us is born with a dream in our hearts. The first realization of this dream probably came when you imagined yourself in another role during childhood. You may not have realized it until you were a teen or a young adult looking up at the stars with that gut feeling of, “there has to be more for me out there.” It may come to you when you are an adult going through a new season. Whatever your age, or stage in life, God placed a purpose in your spirit from the moment you were born. Most of us, including myself, may have taken a bit longer to understand this purpose. Some, again including myself, may fight or ignore that purpose. But you can easily find your purpose with some quiet time, prayer time, and a journal. My childhood dreams of becoming a veterinarian are long past, but my dream and desire to pursue a career in writing have been urging me a lot harder these days. While I love teaching and working with many different students, it’s causing a lot of dis-ease within me. Being a teacher has many emotional rewards and provides a stable income; however, the price of being physically, mentally, and emotionally depleted is not living – it’s merely surviving.
Life has been feeling like those “choose your own adventure” books. Make the wrong decision, and you die. Fortunately, in those books, you restart the adventure. In reality, there is no start-over after death. So I need to restart now! I must reboot both my health and my writing. Where does this leave me with teaching? I will fulfill my contract year because that’s who I am, and it’s the professional thing to do. Along the way, I will create boundaries that will protect my writing time and energy levels. I will take every little step I can to stay on the path of finding a way to catapult my writing past the hobby phase and into the income phase. I invite you to continue this journey with me because it is in community where we heal, learn, grow, and write.
Join the conversation: Please leave me a comment and any suggestions to help me get my writing career monetized and to become a full-time reality.