Posted on by Denise Hartzler

Face Everything And Rise Mindset

In the past, I wrote about the many acronyms for the word fear. The one I specifically wrote about was “False Evidence Appearing Real.” While there is truth to this acronym, I am shifting my mindset to realizing that FEAR should mean “Face Everything And Rise.”

Reframing how one looks at fear can have profound positive effects on one’s ability to push harder toward one’s goals. When we realize the power of facing our fears, we transform an obstacle into an opportunity for growth. Each fear we push past provides a stepping stone toward our most authentic potential. 

How do we embrace this new perspective: 

  1. Acknowledge the fear. Denying a fear gives it power. Write down what you are afraid of and acknowledge its presence. Are you afraid of failure? Are you afraid of upsetting someone? Are you afraid to put your needs ahead of those you love? Are you afraid to make a career change? Are you afraid to give up drinking? Are you afraid of not being perfect? Regardless of how big or small this fear you are holding on to and feeding, it does not matter. The moment you acknowledge its presence is enough to make a shift toward liberation. 
  2. Analyze the source. This part can sometimes be painful as we move towards the root. Finding the root means looking at past experiences, familial or societal pressures, or self-doubt. Find the negative experience and reframe the situation to learn the lesson. Side note: I firmly believe that certain things will keep repeating until the lesson is learned. So, what can you learn from this experience that has your fear firmly rooted in you? 
  3. Take that first step (and small ones after that). Facing everything and rise doesn’t mean diving into the deep end. Take incremental steps toward your goals. I’ll use my fear of public speaking. I started by speaking in front of a small group. Gradually, I began to increase the audience size, and I felt the confidence building. I’m still acclimating, and it’s still nerve-wracking right before I have to speak, but once I get going, I find my nerves settling in for a conversation.  
  4. Celebrate. Every time you face a fear and rise above it, celebrate your achievement. Recognizing your progress reinforces the positive mindset and motivates you to tackle more challenges. Keep a journal of your successes to remind yourself of your strength and resilience.

When you adopt the “Face Everything and Rise mindset,” fear becomes the catalyst for growth. You’ll develop resilience, gain confidence, and expand your comfort zone. Shifting your mindset about fear from avoidance to empowerment can transform your life. 

I hope you can try to embrace the concept of “Face Everything and Rise” to confront your fears head-on and use them as opportunities for growth. Remember, the path to your authentic self often lies on the other side of fear.

Up next on the blog: It’s time to check your surroundings! We are talking about how to take account of who is in your circle. Friends, family, colleagues…if they aren’t inspiring you to be creative, it’s a cage, not a circle!

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

Overcome one…overcome many

This summer, I was determined to overcome one fear. Though it may not seem like a huge goal, it was necessary to me and my anxious brain. In my Summer of Love series, I explored moving from a scarcity mindset to one of abundance. While this mindset shift remains a work in progress, overcoming this one fear was achievable, and I could obtain it rather quickly. 

About three years ago, I attempted to climb to the highest point in the Smoky Mountains. I let my fear get the best of me and missed spectacular views. As we planned to return this year, I couldn’t let this opportunity pass me again. I enlisted the help of my fearless son and told him under no circumstances was he to allow me to back down. One way or another, I was getting to the top of Clingman’s Dome. 

With each passing day, I grew more and more excited. When we reached the base of the ramp to get up to the observation deck, we began the climb. With my son in front of me leading my path, my hand gripped tightly to one of the straps on his camera bag. I kept my eyes fixed on the pavement under my feet. Once I got up to the observation deck, I let go of my son and sat on the bench in the middle. The crowded deck contained brave people who took the nervous journey as I did and others who didn’t possess an ounce of fear. 

I soaked in the sights of the clear sunny summer day. I eventually stood up, grabbed the handlebar, and looked as far as I could to the east and west. I strolled around, bringing myself closer and closer to the edge. I found my husband sitting down below. He was gracious enough to take this picture. Sitting there, he thought, “If she can do it, I can do it too.” Within a few minutes, he was by my side, and we basked in the sights of the Great Smoky Mountains together. We celebrated each other’s success in overcoming this fear. 

This picture is the one I want forever framed in my brain and tattooed on my heart. This is the day I rewired the neuropathways of anxiety to achievement. I am so excited about what fear I will overcome next. 

Take small steps each day. Living with anxiety is not easy; if you find anxiety is prevailing, seek help. There are so many free resources out there offering you ways to heal. Here are a few that I have used: 

As always, talking about anxiety and fear is essential. Let’s keep the conversation going. Have you been able to overcome a fear? If so, what steps did you take to do so, and have you used it as a catalyst to overcome others? Please drop a comment below or visit me on my Instagram page to comment. 

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

Summer of Love Series: Day 1

Welcome to my Summer of Love short blog series, where I will uncover my fears and begin the transformation process of choosing love over fear. This is not a series on overcoming fears of roller coasters, swimming in the ocean, etc. though if that happens – yay! It’s more of a spiritual transformation that will require being in the presence of God, prayer and meditation, and forgiveness so that I may step out of this old way of living and realign my narrative with God’s purpose for my life. 

Day 1: Witnessing my fears. Fear is like water. It moves until it is obstructed or cut off at its source. Fear will seep into every aspect of life until it is cut off. How do we get to the source? First, by witnessing and paying attention to triggers and emotions that affect behaviors.

F – false

E – evidence

A – appearing

R- real

My fears stem from scarcity. Somewhere along the way, I bought into the narrative that there was never enough. Never enough: food, money, love, and attention. I needed to be more intelligent, talented, and disciplined to pursue my dreams. It has stopped me more times than I care to admit, but that’s why I’m here. 

As difficult as this is to write, I am fully committed to this transformation, so it’s time to be honest. I have allowed fear and this scarcity mindset to stop me from living a life God designed for me. Living outside of my purpose has kept me living small. 

Fear and this scarcity mindset have led me to take jobs that drain my energy. It’s the cause of my mindless shopping. It’s permitted me to eat poorly. It’s taught me to crumple up and hide my purpose like a child sneaking candy. It has kept me up at night. It has pushed my body to the breaking point. I have continually stamped down on the seed God planted in my heart. He knows this, and while I am ashamed of doing this to Him, I am grateful for his forgiveness and unconditional love. 

Stepping into God’s forgiveness has opened my eyes and heart to know and understand the source of my fears. It’s allowing me to admit how ugly it has made me feel, which is the first step in this transformation. So where do I go from here? 

I start my day by reading my bible and ensuring I keep Romans 12:2 at the forefront of my day. Romans 12:2 is the bible verse that brought me back to God about 9 years ago. It is committed to my memory, and when I stray too far off course for too long, it begins to pop up all around me. It’s the bumper sticker on the car in front of me. It’s the IG posts from Christian influencers. It’s the message of the weekly sermon. It’s a gentle reminder that it is time to get back in alignment with God’s word and His purpose for my life. 

In case you are unfamiliar, Romans 12:2 states, “Do not conform to the ways of the world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”   

It’s time (yet again) to step into my purpose and step out of doing what no longer serves my purpose in life. When we step out of fear’s grasp, we make space for God to guide us and lead us to creative ways of reaching our genuine selves and potential. 

Thank you for joining me on this journey. Today is Day 1, and I hope you will continue with me until Day 30. Until tomorrow, give your body, mind, and spirit some much-needed grace. 

I’d love to start a new conversation with you. Leave me a comment telling me which bible verse or a saying is closest to your heart. 

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

Leaning in…

I cannot believe I haven’t blogged since Christmas time! I drafted several blog posts, but what I wrote didn’t feel fitting. One day it’ll be the right time, but right now, I’m exploring new territory with my writing and creating. I am looking at my writing with a new lens in this new space. I’m trying to find my voice and my stride. It takes much more discipline these days and a lot of consciousness, but the rewards of being deliberate with my time and aware of positive and negative influences bring me closer to my voice.

I am about to branch out into the side hustle world, and while I’m getting things ready to launch, my writing is expanding past my creative and teaching boundaries. I still love playing with words in a creative space. I still love the basics of academic and technical writing I model for my students. And it’s all happening on paper.

That’s right! I have returned to writing on paper. Not only is it less distracting and easier on my eyes, but it’s also grounding. It could also be the tactile experience that I am enjoying. And writing on paper slows me down – something both my body and brain need. Going slower has been a goal of mine since my time on leave last fall. We live in a rushed world, and when I don’t slow down and step off the proverbial hamster wheel, it negatively affects my mind, body, and soul; returning to pen and paper is healing.

I noticed that writing on paper, besides my messy handwriting, there is less pressure to get each and every word just right. That burden of making every word just right is nothing more than a form of perfectionism, which is why many writers fail to achieve goals. Typing to get every word right was an unconscious block for making progress. With handwriting, I’m also pushing past the urge to rewrite what I worked on the day before. It’s Newton’s law of motion – consciously moving my hand and thoughts forward keeps me moving forward. Another reason for writing by hand is the focus. My focus has severely declined over the last decade. It’s not just age (approaching 50); it’s the mental decline due to endless hours of zombie scrolling and zoning out on my phone and tablet. Yes, phones are great. Heck, I used to work for a mobile app company. So I get it. I actually love playing with technology, but it’s beginning to come at a price. Writing by hand genuinely strengthens my ability to calm my mind and body, allowing me enough stored energy to focus my thoughts to a satisfying conclusion. As my brain carefully considers each letter, word, or phrase, I gain more stamina to push out invading thoughts. Lastly, writing by hand improves my ability to express myself more authentically and allows me to communicate more complex ideas. It’s like a more profound sense of critical thinking. While it also serves as a blank playground where thoughts can expand and grow beyond the page.

In addition to writing on paper, I have been consciously practicing leaning into what brings me joy, energizes me, and makes me feel authentic. I also pay close attention to what depletes me and negatively impacts me. Whether it comes from food, news, the people around me, text messages, music, or my surroundings. They offer one thing: positive or negative energy. If I get sucked into the negative, I excuse myself and walk away or pivot my thoughts or the conversation to something more neutral or positive. Negative energy is sticky energy. It’s like pollen. It sticks to EVERYTHING! It often feels light, but it quickly becomes a weighty burden. This is where boundaries come into play. They are essential to establish. If you are a people pleaser, boundaries are difficult to practice but are critical to your well-being. By leaning into the good and the bad, I (re)learn more about myself and become more confident in protecting all that brings me joy without apologizing.

Just like life, writing is a journey. Some days are trying. Some days are smooth. Self-discovery is also a journey. Creating the life you want is 100% controllable by you. Therefore, I invite you on this journey with me because, as my tagline states, journies are meant to be shared.

I’d love to hear what journey you are on currently. Please drop a comment below, and let’s have a conversation.

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

Choose Your Own Adventure

This past week I met with a new doctor specializing in integrative, holistic solutions. During our session, we covered the symptoms that have challenged my health and well-being since this past summer leading up to my debilitating anxiety and panic disorder earlier this fall. Seeing and understanding the results of eight vials of blood was an awakening. In my heart, I knew my body was out of balance, but I didn’t realize to what extent until I took action to seek out a different path of care.

Taking a path different from the “traditional” is not always bad. I’ve been told these last few years, “this is just the way it is and can be this way for several more years.” I settled for that answer until it landed me in the ER last month. It wasn’t until after I came home from the ER that day did I finally get honest with myself. I knew there had to be a better way to health than just one prescription after another. Note: I am not saying medications are wrong, and plenty of people near and dear to me require medicines for various reasons, but for me, it just wasn’t the answer, and my body strongly sent that message.

Now that I’m on an alternative path to getting my body back in balance, it’s time to get honest with my spirit about my dream of writing full-time.

Each of us is born with a dream in our hearts. The first realization of this dream probably came when you imagined yourself in another role during childhood. You may not have realized it until you were a teen or a young adult looking up at the stars with that gut feeling of, “there has to be more for me out there.” It may come to you when you are an adult going through a new season. Whatever your age, or stage in life, God placed a purpose in your spirit from the moment you were born. Most of us, including myself, may have taken a bit longer to understand this purpose. Some, again including myself, may fight or ignore that purpose. But you can easily find your purpose with some quiet time, prayer time, and a journal. My childhood dreams of becoming a veterinarian are long past, but my dream and desire to pursue a career in writing have been urging me a lot harder these days. While I love teaching and working with many different students, it’s causing a lot of dis-ease within me. Being a teacher has many emotional rewards and provides a stable income; however, the price of being physically, mentally, and emotionally depleted is not living – it’s merely surviving.

Life has been feeling like those “choose your own adventure” books. Make the wrong decision, and you die. Fortunately, in those books, you restart the adventure. In reality, there is no start-over after death. So I need to restart now! I must reboot both my health and my writing. Where does this leave me with teaching? I will fulfill my contract year because that’s who I am, and it’s the professional thing to do. Along the way, I will create boundaries that will protect my writing time and energy levels. I will take every little step I can to stay on the path of finding a way to catapult my writing past the hobby phase and into the income phase. I invite you to continue this journey with me because it is in community where we heal, learn, grow, and write.

Join the conversation: Please leave me a comment and any suggestions to help me get my writing career monetized and to become a full-time reality.

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

You Must Be This Tall to Ride…

Writing Through Anxiety Blog Series #2

There are plenty of reasons I’m not too fond of rollercoasters: the jerking motion, free-falling motion, the tight grip on the handles, the stomach in your throat feeling, and plenty more. It’s never been exhilarating for me. I have even tried to find joy in them. The stress release of screaming your brains out without judgment. The laughter of riders afterward. The wind in your hair. While these are all positives for many, the negative feelings far outweigh the positives. Hell, most of the time, I was never tall enough to ride the rollercoasters, but I did try a few, and it was enough to know that it wasn’t for me. Right now in my life, this journey of battling anxiety with panic disorder is one big rollercoaster ride, and I want off.

These last two weeks have been challenging. One day I will feel like my healthy self, full of peace, calm, and lightness. The next day, my body twitches and tremors, my stomach churns, and my head either hurts or is dizzy. It’s almost four weeks since I started meds, and I can’t tell if they are working or not. I’m guessing they are because the anxiety hasn’t spiraled/escalated into a panic. To me, these little moments are progressing me toward steady days.

Like many others, I’m doing my fair share, probably too obsessively, of research on how to hold down a job with anxiety and panic disorder. I’m trying new breathing techniques, cold showers, long walks, sensory-type grounding practices, cognitive behavior therapy, hypnotherapy, and more. Intellectually, I know it will be a long process to get well, but that doesn’t mean I won’t get frustrated, annoyed, or impatient by how slow this is taking.

So as I continue on this rollercoaster, I am trying my hardest to give myself some grace on the challenging days. My husband is more patient with me than I am on those days. He’s my rock and my support, and I mean that as literally as possible. He truly holds me up when my legs want to give out. He holds my hand when he senses my fear and reassures my soul that I am not alone. When he wraps me in his arms tightly, it eases my rapid heartbeat into a slow thump. On days when I feel strong and at peace, I try to push past my comfort zone and dip my toes in the proverbial waters to see how my body will react.

As I wrestle with all these physical reactions to the world around me, I remind myself that I need to figure out what to do with my teaching career. Right now, it’s on hold in the infamous FMLA status, but even that requires an end date. I want to go back, but it’s hard putting on a mask of bravery when my body is freaking out on the inside. My doctor and therapist advise me that I shouldn’t decide while feeling this way. Unfortunately, it feels like unfinished business. Plus, there’s the weight of knowing how much extra work it is putting on your colleagues.

Writing through all this has been helpful and feels substantial. I wish I were well enough to share with my students just how important it is to write your way through the ups and downs, twists and turns, and the backward motion of the rollercoaster. I also wish I was not tall enough to ride this ride, but there is a purpose, and I’m determined to find the purpose of this journey.

Action Step: I encourage you to leave a comment and share your story with me. I am a firm believer that we can never heal in isolation. We heal in our community. I urge you to find your community if you struggle with mental health. It doesn’t need to be a large group but find your people.

I count my blessings for my community of supporters. Without their love, patience, and support, I would be lost and lonely. Like my motto, “Writing is a life-long journey meant to be shared,” I can now confidently say the same about healing my anxiety ~ it may be a life-long journey, but I’m grateful I can share it with you and those around me.

Disclaimer: This is by no means therapy or professional advice. This blog series is my narrative, my journey, that I am sharing with you in hopes of encouraging you to begin healing your anxiety.

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

Writing through anxiety

About three weeks ago, sheer terror took over my brain as I tried to get myself into school. I pulled over to the side of the road trying to catch my breath, but my breathing was labored while my stomach churned out one wave of nausea after another. My heart pounded my chest wall like it no longer wanted to remain in my body. Every nerve in my body reacted to every sound with a jolt of electric shocks while my muscles twitched. This was the worst panic attack of my life.

The following days were plagued with manic bouts of sobbing. My body was releasing an immense array of emotions. Positive and negative thoughts swung like a heavy pendulum with no rest in the middle. I lost all sense of who I was and couldn’t feel any sort of my old self. My support circle of my husband, my son, my family, and friends immediately surrounded me in love and prayer. They became my stable ground while I lost all sense of being able to stand on my own.

As the days continued with my husband by my side, my son reassuring me, and my family and friends checking in throughout the day, my body and brain continued on this path of panic. Tense muscles twitched me awake throughout the night. Guilt wakes me up early mornings knowing there are no subs to cover my team at work. As I tried to continue to press through the day with the most mundane tasks of showering and eating, I was continually assaulted by those electric shocks numbing my chest and limbs. This was tearing me down.

I decided to take a medical leave of absence. This was the hardest decision of my professional life. It was a quick decision but one that had to be made sooner rather than later. Beyond the basics of knowing that I could not be responsible for young adults at this time, the weight of not having to put on a mask of calm to get through the day, was a deep breath that I needed.

As I continue to heal and go through trials of various medications, I am learning to give my body the time it needs to heal because I only have this one body and one mind. The healing process is a tug of war with my ego. My body and mind have been on a steady decline of brokenness and my ego kept me going for all the wrong reasons. So while the breakdown was slow, my ego expects a quick fix. Relearning how to be in rest is challenging but for a nervous system that is on hyperdrive, rest is necessary.

When the meds don’t have me in a fog, I will write my way through this journey. And with every [writing] journey, pacing is everything, being present is necessary, and forgiveness is essential. I am more determined than ever to resurface my purpose through writing. Putting words on the page is my breath and my best defense against an anxious beast wanting to do nothing more than escalate and spiral me far from reality.

If you are struggling with your mental health, please do not suffer alone. Find your circle of support and if you aren’t sure where to turn, please contact 988 for help.

Please leave a comment of encouragement, empowerment, or your story. It’s only when we openly talk about mental health that we can begin to remove the stigmas and heal.

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

In honor of MLK Day

“If you can’t fly, then run. If you can’t run, then walk. If you can’t walk, then crawl. Whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
MLK Monument

Whatever it is that you want to see changed in yourself or the world, YOU have the power to make a positive difference. With each small step in the right direction, you will reach your destination. So though these words are short today, keep taking those small, daily steps towards progress.

Posted on by Denise Hartzler

Happy birthday, America!

Happy fourth of July, America! Another year to celebrate all that this country has been through and continues to face. As we celebrate America’s birthday with all things “American” – hamburgers, hot dogs, picnics, family gatherings, fireworks, concerts, work, and so much more, it got me thinking, what does celebrating the Fourth of July have to do with writing? A lot, but I’ll mention only a few that are on my mind.

First and foremost, America was born from an idea.

Much like stories, America was nothing more than an idea. That idea led to conversations that expanded into a more extended narrative and reached more and more people. These people then took upon the idea of freedom and fought hard for it, and because they put the word freedom into action, a new nation was born. That is America’s history at its core. A nation born from an idea.

America’s narrative continues to undergo edits and rewrites, year after year. If you are a writer, you know that your first piece of writing must undergo edits and revisions before leaving your computer. No one, and I mean no one who wants a career in writing, will ever submit the first draft to an agent, editor, or even their blog without a few rewrites or edits. And that’s how this great country survives and thrives. I will not get into the politics of rewriting history, but whether we like it or not, America is undergoing a revision. And as writers, we know revisions can be long, arduous, and painful but necessary.

So, my dear America, I want to tell you on your birthday: stay strong. You will survive all that we have faced this past year, and you will continue to thrive. How do I know this? Because you are that never-ending novel that doesn’t want to stay in the top drawer, you have never-ending revisions, and with each passing year, authors write their version of your original idea – freedom and justice for all.

Happy Birthday, America!